I don't even know what to title this one....

I have to get this out somewhere....

I have been contemplating temple marriage lately.  I have been doing so for many reasons: seeing the blessings that Neal and I have received because of our choice to be married in the temple, the Denver Temple matron's death and how comforting it must be for her family to have those blessings, people that I care about making decisions that are not leading them to a temple marriage, etc.

What I have decided: people choosing to not receive temple blessings makes me really sad.  These decisions make me sad especially after feeling the blessings in my life.  How can someone who's done amazing things in the Gospel, and say they know it is true, just act like it doesn't matter anymore?  Especially when they love a person so much, they truly WANT to be with them forever.  I just don't understand.  I also don't understand how something can literally be a part of you, but you don't care if the person you marry feels it is as big of a part of them?  I guess the answer is: you don't.  I have found that the saying "A woman should be so lost in God that a man needs to seek God to find her" (and vice versa) to be true.  At least it should be, right?

I don't know.  I'm just sad about it I guess...

The things I've learned in (almost) 4 months of being married

These are in no partiular order.  They're for those of you who've been married for longer to laugh at, and for those of you who haven't to learn now.

1. I'm not quite as humble as I thought I was.
2. Prayer is the key - if you pray together before bed, there's no way you can go to bed angry.
3. Taking ten minutes to wash all the dishes before you go to bed saves you 45 minutes in the long run.
4a. Don't wash king-size comforters unless you have to, b. If you do have to, don't start at 7:00 pm when you have to get up at 6:30 am, c. When you wash it, don't use powder detergent; use liquid.  Powder detergent doesn't wash out all the way and becomes gummy and clumpy when you pull it out of the washer to put it in the dryer.
5. The husband is the priesthood leader of the home.  Its really hard to stay mad at him when he uses that authority in a "discussion" and you know he's using it righteously.
6. Keeping the house spotless isn't as easy as you thought it was when you lived at your parents house.
7. Getting up at 4 am to make bread, make a full breakfast, exercise, get ready, and clean the house (all before you start a big lunch at noon), just isn't reasonable.
8. There are more important things in life than things.
9. Life changes.  Your spouse becomes your best friend instead of a group of girls.
10. "Keeping up with the Jones' " just isn't worth it.  Work at your own pace, and do things when they're right for you.

I'm sure there are more, but these are the ones that've been on my mind (the comforter one especially...I experienced that one last night).  Enjoy!

Fasting, prayer, and a little bit of faith

About a month ago Neal and I made our first major purchase as a married couple: a 2002 red Toyota Corolla.  We thought it was a great deal!  When we test drove the car, it drove great and we couldn't seem to find any problems with it.  It has a few miles on it, but for a commuter car and with the reputation Toyota's have, we didn't mind too much.  The only other problem was that the check engine light came on while we were driving it.  We told our car salesman, Mark at The Right Ride in Loveland (good dealership by the way) that we'd take it, as long as they fixed whatever was causing the check engine light to come on.  Mark took it to his mechanic right away.  They diagnosed it as a bad O2 sensor, and said they'd have it fixed the next day.  Ten days later, after finding a loan, we officially purchased the car.

Neal picked it up on a Thursday and immediately noticed something was wrong.  The biggest problem was that the car wasn't accelerating correctly.  We decided we'd give it a few days driving around because the car hadn't been driven for over a week, and if it wasn't better, we'd call Mark.  Well, it didn't get better and the check engine light came back on.  We took the car in to Mark, and he sent it back over to his mechanic to diagnose the problem.  We were told that it was the cadalydic (sp?) converter: the other possibility that would set of the check engine light for the code it was reading.  So, we replaced the converter, not a big deal.

Got the car back about three days later, and it still wasn't fixed.  It was better, but not fixed.  About a week and a half ago, we took the car back into the mechanic because the check engine light was on AGAIN.  After having the car for a week, they finally figured out the problem was with the O2 sensor that they put in to replace the old one.  We told them to replace the part; we didn't have much of a choice...we need a second car with both of us working.

When we left the temple this morning, Neal had a message from the mechanic.  Our car was fixed and ready to be paid for and picked up.  We were worried though.  The mechanic said the part was at least twice the price of the original part (apparently Toyotas don't like after-market parts...it has to be a Toyota brand).  The total bill came up to be $250 after the refund for the original replacement part and labor.  We stressed out BIG time.  A $250 bill is not exactly what we needed right now.  But, we had been praying for days and Neal had fasted that everything would work out.

We called Mark and explained to him what was going on.  At first, he refused to pay more than half of the part - he said if he paid more than that, he would be losing money on the sale.  I told him we understood and hung up the phone.  We were lost.  We didn't know what to do.  After much discussion, we decided to stop by the dealership on our way home, and give it one last shot before we went to the mechanic.  I don't know how he did it, but Neal gave an irrefutable argument, and Mark agreed to pay for the ENTIRE repair.

As we were driving to the mechanic to pick up our car, I was on the verge of tears.  I told Neal how grateful I was that he fasted on Sunday for this specific problem.  He looked at me and said, "Not to mention the fact that I was praying the entire way down 287 (from south Longmont to south Loveland) that we would know what to say and that everything would work out and that Mark would understand where we were coming from!"  What a wonderful husband!  I would have never thought to pray for that - I was too wrapped up in the fact that we were facing a $250 repair that we really shouldn't have to pay for!

Moral of the story: fasting and prayer work when you put your faith behind them.  Heavenly Father is always mindful of us, and of our situations.  He will never ever let us go into a battle by ourselves, and as long as we are always grateful, He will always bless us with tender mercies.  How grateful I am for that!

PS.  If you're looking for a new/used car, go to The Right Ride in south Loveland.  Mark and Nickle really are nice people, and we have had only good dealings with them!

Things I learn the hard way

So I had a test today, that I absolutely was not prepared for.  I prayed and prayed for assistance from Heavenly Father, and received that help.  However, I didn't recognize that help when it was standing in front of my face.  My biggest worry was the 1.5 to 2 page essay question that is on every test.  I hadn't been in class much due to vacations, work, and illness, and so I had NO idea what the essay was going to be about.  I prayed to my Heavenly Father about this specifically, and immediately thought about one of the chapters in the book that the test was over.  However, I dismissed that thought immediately, and kept searching for some "more profound" answer.  I studied and studied my book, but for some reason left out the specific chapter I had "just thought" about during my prayer.

Today, when I went in to take my test, I looked at the essay question.  "Please describe in detail the four domains of language."  The one chapter I didn't study.  The one chapter I didn't study, even though I had received an answer from an all-knowing God.  How frustrated I was with myself!  Luckily, I have a Heavenly Father who knew I probably wouldn't listen to that answer, and would have to let go of it and label it a learning experience.  He guided my answers and my studies so I knew all the multiple choice answers (over 70% of the test grade), so my class grade wouldn't plummet.

How interesting this experience is though.  I had an answer.  A very clear and direct answer.  One that I discounted just because it didn't come in a profound way.  What a great reminder of how simple the Spirit works, and how simple answers can be.  We don't always see angels as prophets of old did - those experiences are in the scriptures because they were special, and they wouldn't have been special if they happened every day to everyone.  Hopefully, this will be an experience that can be brought to my memory when I need it, and I can learn from it!

Thinking about my children

I have been thinking a lot about my future children lately.  After getting endowed and married in the temple, I realize how important it is to have that great blessing.  I have been thinking a lot about the importance of prophets and following their council.  I want so badly for our children to have a testimony of the Gospel, serve missions, and marry in the temple.  So what do I do to ensure that I'm doing my best to accomplish this goal?

Neal and I have been talking a lot about this.  I've been praying a lot about this.  I've discovered the answer is to follow exactly what the prophets say to do.  Read the scriptures, pray, have family home evening, etc.  But what can I do now?  Well, I can make sure I have a solid testimony of the Gospel.  I can increase my love for and desire to go to the temple.  I can listen to the prophets, follow their council, and know the words they've spoken.  I can have a solid testimony of the Book of Mormon and Joseph Smith.  And more than anything, I can have a testimony of Jesus Christ, and know that the Atonement works.  I can know that I am a daughter of God, and that my children will be sons and daughters of God.  I can love my husband, and work hard to be selfless and kind and caring in our relationship.  I can attend my church meetings, and fulfill my callings.  I can do everything I can do to be an example to my children, and let them know I love them, and the Gospel.

I KNOW the Gospel is true.  I KNOW Jesus Christ is my Savior.  I KNOW I am a daughter of God, and I love Him, and I know he loves me.  I love my husband, and I know I get to be with him forever due to the priesthood keys that have been restored in these latter-days.  I know that the temple is important, and that we should go there as often as possible.  I know that Joseph Smith was the first prophet of these latter-days, and that the true Gospel was restored through him.  I know President Thomas S. Monson is the prophet today, and that he leads and guides not only our Church, but the world today.  I know the Book of Mormon is a true book, and is doctrinal scripture.  I know it is the record of a people in the Americas who were guided and directed by God.  I love my God.  I love the Gospel, and I'm not afraid to say it!

Philosophy...blegh.

A couple semesters ago when I took my "logic" philosophy class, I loved it.  Partially because it was a class I skated through cause there really wasn't much thought that had to go into it.  THIS semester however, I really, really, REALLY don't like my ethics class.  We never ever come to conclusions and basically religion is all thought to be a sorry excuse for reason.  It's driving me NUTS!  I cannot WAIT until this semester is over.  The only class that I'm super excelling in, is Economics (which is funny cause I originally failed the online class).  So, I'm venting.  Because philosophy is stupid and I can't stand it.  Luckily, my teacher knows I hate a lot of the ethical theories we talk about, and he thinks it's quite funny.

Ugh....school....

I am very grateful for the opportunity to get a degree.  I really am.  I'm grateful for the financial ability, and that my work lets me take time off so I don't have to take night classes.  However, I've got senioritis.  Bad.

Its becoming very difficult for me to have the desire and the focus to complete my school work, and studying for tests is even more difficult (made apparent by my physics test score on Thursday last week....).  Does anybody have any cures??  I'd much rather be planning a wedding and working to save up as much money as I can.....